An Interview with Ryan

After going to the in-laws’ house for Ryan’s dad’s birthday last night (Happy 55th, Mike), we talked about how we could get Ryan more involved with the blog in his own way. Eventually, you’ll see vlogs and vines of him talking about guns in his man cave or how to properly eat a messy burger on the go when you’re carrying a baby around your chest. Or perhaps proper beard grooming skills? “I don’t know if we’ll have enough time!

He even suggested a segment of  what really grinds his gears. Great change of pace from recipes, right? Look at us… reaching out to all different kinds of readers. The angry and the hungry 😉

So we agreed that it would be fun for me to conduct an interview with The Beard himself. But before I do, allow me to give a little background information on his man o’ mine.

As the youngest of three boys growing up in a military family, this kid grew up playing in the dirt, building forts, pretending to be GI Joe and everything lots of kids do in their formative years.

Not much has changed!

He joined the Army right out of high school, served overseas, and did some badass things as a mechanic and gunner.


He also married a girl with weird hair.

Pre-beard, circa 2008

After the tough decision of stepping away from the 20-year Army track, he took the wealth of knowledge he got from 8 years active duty and stepped into the civilian world head and shoulders above most college graduates I know. There’s something to be said about a man who will put his mental health and family first before anything. For me, it’s cool to see what opportunities he has now and the wealth of open doors he will have down the line. All because he started his adulthood with service.

You’ll never meet a more loyal, honest, genuine man. You can tell he was raised with love because of the love he shares with those closest to him.  He’s not afraid to express his opinion or his weaknesses (not always a good thing!) AND he’s pretty good at reciting lines from movies such as Forrest Gump, Old School, Step Brothers and more. I’ve never met anyone who has made me laugh more than this guy. Hopefully he can make you laugh too!

He kind of reminds me of these two combined:

The Other Guys (2010)

aaaand this guy:

Duck Dynasty (2012)

So I present to you, an interview with Ryan:

M: You’re not a pickup line guy, but if you had to use one what would it be? You didn’t use one with me, so I’m curious.
R: I don’t need pickup lines. I definitely don’t need it now. If I did, I’d be screwed.

M: You’ve traveled all over the world as an Air Force brat and as a soldier. Where is somewhere you’d like to go that you haven’t busted yet?
R: Austria, because that’s where my ancestors are from and I would like to see Hitler’s Eagle’s Nest in the mountains if it’s still there. Or at least go where it was, where the troops were when the war ended.
Rome, because I want to see Colessium; Paris to see the Eiffel Tower; Tahiti, because I want to be in a bungalow where the floor is the ocean. And the Philippines, because your family’s from there.

M: Anywhere in the US?
R: Arlington National Cemetery.
M: No explanation needed there!

M: Tell me what you think about gun control. Whether it be a legislative action or personal practices used at home that limits or allows owners.
R: When I hear of gun control, I think of people who are limiting what you can and can’t do. Just because something illegal, doesn’t mean it’s going to stop criminals from using them. I would like it to be mandatory for anyone over 18 to have a license to carry. Towns that implement that, crime rates are lower. It’s everyone’s right to own a gun, but it’s also their right to be responsible enough to have that gun.

M: I think everyone can agree on the importance of gun safety. Who are the best teachers for that?
R: Parents and the military. There should be mandatory military service.

M: Speaking of the military, what are the most important things you learned when you were in?
R: Selfess service, dignity and respect.

M: And speaking of guns, which one is your favorite one to shoot?
R: The Browning M2 “Ma Deuce” heavy barrel. Also known as the 50 cal.
Ryan testing an M2. Be warned! It’s loud!

M: If you could be a superhero, who would you be?
R: Ironman. Because he’s F***** badass and he can fly. Ironman doesn’t have a weakness. He’s also very rich.

M: You’re having a bad day. If money wasn’t an issue, what would be your way of turning your day around?
R: We’d get a limo to an airport and go to Maui, stay in our own secluded house in Hana that is only accessible by helicopter.

M: The holidays just wrapped up and I know you spent more time in a mall this season than you normally would in a year. What grinds your gears about malls?
R: Parents who don’t control their kids, kids who don’t listen. Walking in front of Hollister and it smells like preppy kids. I hate the cell phone kiosks because they always ask what kind of phone you have. I hate being solicited. I do not like malls.

M: What grinds your gears about OUR generation?
R: Lack of respect and sense of entitlement. A lot of kids haven’t earned what they have or earned their keep.

M: What activity do you enjoy that most other people wouldn’t enjoy?
R: Yard work. Because it’s my house. I own something and I have to take care of it. It’s relaxing and it’s a cheap, free labor.

M: Celebrity crush?
R: Sofia Vergara

M: What was the worst thing about being youngest?
R: Hand me downs. Years after the style. And I had to wear Josh’s sweater-vests. They’re actually quite comfortable.*

*Karlene, help me find photos of Ryan in sweater-vests. Bonus if he has a bowl cut.

M:What was the best thing about being the youngest?
R: I pretty much got whatever I wanted, or at least had help paying for it.

M: What qualities do you look for in a friend?
R: Honesty, loyalty and stuff in common. Friendships are based on common shit.

M: Picture your life in 20 years. What’s going on in your life?
R: We have our own business living in Maui. Kids are going to school. And I have a trophy truck as my daily driver.

M: What qualities do you hope our kids have?
R: I hope our kids have all of my qualities.
M: Even the bad ones?
R: Yeah, no ones perfect. Makes your good qualities better.
M: Any qualities of mine that you hope they have?
R: I hope they’re all just like you in every way. Book smart, sense of humor… is beauty a quality?
M: I wouldn’t say so.
R: Just put it down! That’s my answer.

M: What’s the worst advice you’ve ever been given?
R: Hearing everyone in the military tell me to wait to get married. But when you know you know. And they just try to scare you.

M: Best advice?
R: Do what makes you happy.

Got questions for the elusive Ryan? Leave a question in the comments. He’s a good talker and worthy debater. It drives me nuts.